My Classy Christmas List

The holiday season is here! A lot of you probably don't know what to get ol' Bruiser here, but no worries! [Look no further than this list to find out what Bruiser does NOT WANT.] I picked out the classiest 'stache gifts of the season:



1. Moustached Cufflinks - Nothing says class act like cufflinks or moustaches, so its only natural that they go so well together. Like peanut butter and jelly.

2. "Ain't ya got a little class to go with that mustache?" Poster - The coolest poster of all time. Hands and staches down.

3. Yosemite Sam Key Ring - It's made of repurposed suede (classy) and thats green, which makes it even more classy.

4. Moustached Glass - The classiest thing to come out of UO ever.

5. Moustached pacifier - I neither have a child nor intend on receiving this item, but if you are a parent struggling with your baby's ugliness or unsuaveness, this may be the answer.

6. Moustached Octopus - There are about 0 animals cooler than the octopus, its so fucking smart it blows my mind. And when they wear moustaches, I reconsider my career path.

7. Moustached Moose Shirt - Mooses are cool shit. I never want to encounter one, but they are about as epic as North America gets. I am inspired to buy a Moose head and attach a moustache to it. Or call the manager of Bugaboo Creek.


Easily the classiest Christmas eva
-bruiser