Sports Anchors

Here's the thing about sports anchors/announcers/commentators: they are (usually) retired atheletes who are fat, balding, and out of shape.

Now Chris Berman was not an athelete, but is old, fat, and balding. You say, so what? This happens to everyone.

The point I'm making is that these men are lacking moustaches. Chris Berman had a moustache for a period of time recently - at that point he was guy with moustache. Once he shaved it, he became old, fat announcer guy. A moustache is like a guy's makeup - it hides your flaws and/or distracts from them.

Okay, so he has clearly lost some weight and stopped hitting the tanning bed and gained a few hair plugs. But otherwise, left Chris Berman still looks a whole lot more trustworthy and professional than right Christ Berman. If you have ever been at a loss for an example where moustaches decrease one's creepiness factor, here it is. 

For the sake of all you sportsfans out there, here's hoping Berman's stache comes back.

-bruiser

The man that grows a Mo is only content when all are content.