Awkward Phillies Player #1: Ryan Madson

So this morning I hit the Sports Stache picture jackpot. Not only are they of fantastic quality, they are also some of the most awkward professional pictures you have ever seen. Presenting Phillies Stache Sundays sprinkled with a little bit of awkwardness! You can view the whole gallery here, if you want to ruin the fun of unveiling a new photo each week. So don't do it. I just feel obligated to post a link.

So why phillies? For multiple weeks? Well, appurantly theyre in first place, which is undoubtably nawt a surprise to my family, and I still don't really care. Its just so boring! But theses photos are so far from boring, hence the series of posts.

Awkward Player #1: Ryan Madson

 In order to truly capture the awkwardness, view photo #1 and photo #2 together.  Look at how distracted he is while posing in a false pitching stance. He looks like he's making goggly-eyes at some girl with big chachis in the stands next to home base. Or witnessing an alien abduction. This picture screams less 'professional baseball pitcher' and more 'adult halloween costume'.

Look at photo #2. This one looks like he is having a religious experience. Madson - don't you realize that connecting with the big man upstairs on a baseball field is so cliché? I mean, its been done. Circa 1994.

You may also note the digital colorization of these pics. I honestly think that really puts the awkwardness over the top. The black back-drop and the bright lighting screams broadway-production, no? And then the color is completely washed away in the head shot. Nice. Not only is he the star of a hit musical, he also looks like a malnourished villager that has been photographed by National Geographic.

I will say that the saturation really brings out his scruff. Looks Good. And excellent use of product placement. Nike will be proud.

-bruiser